Daughters Men Portraits African American Fathers
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Recently, I moderated a black men’s seminar at Zahra’s bookstore in Inglewood, California. The group present consisted of in regards to 20 men and 7 women. Our guest author was Ken Mask, M.D., from New Orleans, Louisiana. (Titles: Murder on the Butt, Luke Jacobs, PI, City Park Murder.) During the two hours, we covered diverse subjects such as what men actually feel when it comes to being fatherless, how to recognize the silent cries of men, what single women need to know when rearing a male child, men’s fear of commitment, and the conduct of broken men. However, the main topic we covered was the selfassurance a male child acquires from his father. Although women were present in the seminar, their worries were why men had such a fear of commitment. What we concluded, though, was that this fear of commitment ofttimes could be traced back to the lack of a strong father figure in their lives. Clearly, the better modeling men have of responsible fatherhood, the better fathers they may become. From the disclosures made for the duration of the seminar, there is unquestionably a need for black men to have an example of how powerful a good father’s influence may be. In an idealisti world we would have all grown up with strong fathers in spite of racism, unemployment, alcoholism, prison and the myriad things which negatively affect Black men. But unfortunately, we don’t live in the idealisti world. So I’m a strong believer in bibliotherapy–using books as a way of healing our souls. Often, for Black people, these examples may be found in African American literature. Here is a list of books, which deal with the selfassurance a male (or female) child acquires from a father. These are just a few of the books. You may compile your own list. Sweet Summer, Growing Up With and Without My Dad by Bebe Moore Campbell. This book details how the late Bebe Moore Campbell would go visit her divorced father in the summer while she was growing up. Although he was in a wheel chair, he stood tall in instructing her the tame lessons of womanhood. Sounder by William H. Armstrong. Even altho the sharecropping father is sent away to prison, he had a strong presence in the book and he unquestionably influenced his son to grow up as a man. In Roll of Thunder, Hear My Cry by Mildred D. Taylor, Cassie Logan and her three brothers come to understand why the land they own means so much to their Papa. “Look out there, Cassie girl. All that belongs to you. You ain’t never had to live on nobody’s place but your own and long as I live and the family survives, you’ll never have to. That’s important. You may not understand that now but one day you will. Then you’ll see.” In the classic, Roots, by Alex Haley, the fathers in this family saga were strong, inspite of captivity, slavery, Jim Crow, and segregation. Who may ever forget the handing down of the story of the “Old African” from generation to generation? In All in the Family, anthology, Janice Sims, Melanie Schuster, Maxine Thompson, the father, Mr. Johnson, is a progressed day farmer, and a good father to his four daughters, which helps them pick good mates. Murder on the Butt, Luke Jacobs, PI, City Park Murder, Luke Jacob, PI, City Park Murder, Ken Mask, M.D. As a private Investigator, the main character, Luke Jacob always reflects back to what his late police father would have done. In A Raisin in the Sun, by Lorraine Hansberry. Who may ever forget the pride reflected in the son’s face when his father, Walter, said, “We are very proud, and this is my son, who makes the sixth generation of our family in this country…” Also, the fact that his father stood up, refused to trade back the house to the bigoted neighbors, and did the right thing. After all, isn’t that what African American creative writing of recognized artisti value is about? Showing us a way to live in the world with dignity, in spite of racism, bigotry and poverty? Back to the seminar, at the end of the forum, these are a heap of of the solutions we came up with for fathers. 1. Include God in your life as the head of your family. 2. Turn off the TV and the Internet and commune with your children. 3. Take time to engage in old-fashioned pastimes such as bible studies, fishing, camping, bowling. 4. Take time to hug your children. 5. Tell your children you love them. As for fathers who have been absent in your children’s lives, make time to become involved with your children, even if they are now adults. It is never too late. |
What a treat!
Excellent book…moving and inspiring!